(Sharing 1st January 2011)
God promised to bring our parents to our church. Similarly to the blood infection (dengue fever) I had when I really need to settle down in my new church years ago, my father now had to go through blood infection to come to our church. Frankly speaking, my parents have not totally agreed to coming over, because they cannot understand the actual reason to come to our church. The days during the hospital showed many people from Sion coming, and I know it is not that easy for them to come over. The thing is not so much about them changing to a church where we can all worship God together and have more time together, but in Liwen, Suyun and my perspective, we see the contrast of how much our parents are receiving messages from Sion and us receiving grace from our own church. In fact, this contrast is heaven and hell of a difference, and it has pained my heart for years to see them receiving incomplete and non-holistic teachings from their church. I am not saying that their church is serving God incorrectly, as if you search in the youtube, you will find many of their blessed hymn presentations. But I know this cannot continue. Just after my mother shared her experiences with father being in ICU at end of year prayer, she told me even though she is more active than me in evangelism, “You have one fruit, but I do not have any fruits from spreading the gospel even till now.”
During the process of my father getting healed, I can see God wants me to slowly give the Emmanuel message to my parents through my whole life – smiles, acceptance, taking in mother’s frustrations, caring for them, keep giving and showing evidences that God is alive to them, so that they will notice the difference! I know God has given me this conviction to pray for my parents this way, because I have peace that God will accomplish, so that I put down my anxiousness to think about writing a letter to Pastor Ong again, to ask our parents back, who are rightfully ours. I thank God for everything, for they are indeed lovely and the best. I thank God for Liwen, my wife, for when I recall every squabble and everything slow that she is actually calms my anxious nature down, and turns me to God to seek for the filling of the Holy Spirit. May the powerful love of Emmanuel shine from me to my parents and family. It is really time for me to take care of parents and family – spirit, soul, body, living, relationships, finance and serving, as God has given me views that they need my prayerful help as a son, and may I do so with the smiles of The Good Shepherd.
This week, our pastor Zhishan, is going to China. May everything he has experienced of the Jesus Christ’s heart spring the living water to all disciples and jewels. In my heart, I am just so excited!
Below are my draft notes and 7-days diary of what happened to my father.
26 Dec Sunday
Father’s oxygen tubes were taken out.
27 Dec Monday
Father began to cough a little, in fact, more as we go towards late evening.
28 Dec Tuesday
Morning, oxygen tubes were placed back in, as father was coughing very badly.
X-rays were taken. We received news that Tracheotomy had to be performed if father showed signs of not recovering soon, and they would not take out the oxygen tubes anymore.
29 Dec Wednesday
Situation was not much different from yesterday, and father was sometimes coughing through the oxygen tubes. Father was not biting the tubes any more, because they also placed sedatives and some things into the mouth to prevent him from so doing.
30 Dec Thursday
ICU called us that we needed to sign a consent form to allow the minor operation to do tracheotomy. I have mixed feelings for Tracheotomy. It is about opening a cut in the air passage below the throat, and though the percentage is not high, there are cases where people lose voice and ability to sing. This is not nice for those called by God, for we use our tongue and throat to witness, to drive demons and to sing praises of hymns. In my heart, I really hoped to delay this as much as possible, because I know my father, who is somehow similar to my character, who would just rather suffer in silence than having more cuts, scars and any more to put our appearance down. However, I know God wanted me to pray until I can pray for someone to go through the extent of sufferings that he really hated and have peace with sincere compassion.
31 Dec Friday
We had a meeting with the boss doctor of ICU. He confirmed that the X-rays taken 3 days ago were pneumonia – lung infection. All other organs were getting better, but father had a major hurdle to cross, and this was healing his breathing system through the help of antibiotics and his immune system. Doctor did mention some interesting fact, that they were unable to pinpoint the exact germ/bacteria causing the lung infection, and the reason was because they tried high dosages of antibiotics, and this may cause the bacteria to reduce (but not eliminate) to an amount so that they cannot pinpoint the actual bacteria causing pneumonia. Then my mum went “mad” again by giving outlets of frustration with the houseman who delayed seeing my father in pain on 16th December, which actually caused many toxins to spread.
1 Jan Saturday
Sedatives were down by half, and father struggled a bit. He wanted to write, but was unable to write anything due to his weak hands. He was still coughing when we saw him, but we heard from nurses that the midnight morning after our church prayed, he had a peaceful night without coughing. We stayed outside ICU more, not wanting to disturb father’s peaceful rest.