Drafted since 2012-10-17
I had another quarrel with my mum yesterday before discipleship training. It seemed that I have endured her health products propaganda. The singspiration was really good. The discipleship training message is really good. Through these blessed full-time ministers, it triggered remembrance to the message God gave to our gospel station – John chapters 18-19.
Jesus had troublesome disciples. They were rash and were easily discouraged. But Jesus loved them, not in heart, but in deeds.
Peter cut the high priest’s ear, but Jesus covered his rashness / anxiousness and healed the ear. Peter denied Christ 3 times, but Jesus forgave 70×7 times. Did the disciples trouble Him? In fact, it was so much it made this Teacher look bad. The disciples were always learning but not understanding many times. Until the end, Peter even responded with Phileo love when Jesus asked him 3 times of Agape love. In Gethsemane, 2 times He went to tell them to watch and pray, lest temptation overtakes them. For the first 2 times, He told them, “Can’t you just watch for me one hour?” But they could not even listen to the Lord of Creation to open their sleepy eyes for one hour. The third time, He went and saw them still sleeping, and He left them and prayed on His own. Jesus knew He had to lead them. When band of soldiers, officers of chief priests and Pharisees came to want to take Jesus, He told them, “I told you that I am He. So, if you seek Me, let these men go.” Jesus did not want anyone whom God had given Him to be lost: “Of those whom you gave me I have lost not one.” And when He was judged by the high priest Annas, his son-in-law Caiaphas and Pilate, He faced them bravely. He could face judgment and sufferings boldy because He had already entrusted his disciples to God, and knew that they must be completely be taken care of by the Holy Spirit Who is to come, because the world had already hated them.
When you love someone, you have to take in their troubles, cover them, suffer for them, and lead them to the Holy Spirit. This written in Isaiah 53:4-6, (in my own paraphrase) “Surely He is the One to take up our pain and bore our suffering. Yet (by His looks, judgement, lousy disciples), we considered him punished by God, stricken by Him, and afflicted. But (it was then discovered to our shock that) He was pierced for our transgressions, He was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was on Him, and by his wounds we are healed. (It is us who had nailed Him to the cross! How wronged were we!) We all, like sheep, have gone astray, each of us has turned to our own way; and the Lord has laid on him the iniquity of us all. (How can it be, this amazing love?)” This is the only way Satan’s head can be crushed. The spiritual reason has to come from understanding that I was wrong to the spirit, but totally forgiven to the spirit by someone totally righteous.
I made a covenant with God. If the food that my mum brings to me will worsen my health, so be it. (Yes, it seems so even though out of her love as a parent, though I would not elaborate on the details here.) If the secular things she is now after will bring any “shame to the cross”, so be it. I must carry that cross. I want no other peace than being totally filial to my parents and to gain their total blessings for me – spiritual and everything.
Today evening, my father complained to me that my mum may have made someone afraid of coming to our church because she continues to chase after that elderly person to buy her health products. I had peace. I told my father, “Mother is used by God to let only those who truly and purely desire God to come to our church.” I am going to start believing that God has given the best of everything to me.